A Life Less Ordinary

The rules of a business class lounge.

One must:

 

• Always maximise the time in the lounge, bypassing all duty-free shops, including Reiss, Kurt Geiger and Smythson. Even if one has found plentiful goods to purchase.
• Stop off at WHSmith to buy 1l bottle of water (if one is swathed in cashmere for the duration of the flight, one must ensure one is re-hydrated throughout...)
• Grab every English fashion / style / gossip related magazine possible. Avoid all Scandinavian magazines and copies of the Daily Mail.
• Suss out immediately, whilst not looking like a novice, exactly where the food, beverages and bathrooms are located. In particular when one hasn´t used this particular lounge before...
• Position oneself next to, or close to, said food and beverage counter to maximise consumption and intake.
• Fill one's plate with at least one of every single morsel on offer. Including the shortbread biscuits. And the mini crackers. Even if you're not hungry; this is a vital part of the experience.
• Check out all of your fellow travellers and wonder who will be next to you on the flight. Pray it's not the guy freeloading on the Asahi beer and peanuts. Or the brat-ish Japanese kids running circles around their passive parents.
• Avoid eye contact with aforementioned freeloader, who has now positioned himself next to you in the Business Centre, even though there is half a lounge of empty seats available for the taking.
• Check the Departures board occasionally, to ensure one does not miss one's flight, due to excessive prosecco consumption.
• Understand how to use a Scandinavian keyboard, or at least have the ability and dexterity to maneuver the mouse to make changes to every single word. After excessive prosecco consumption.
• Not curse too loudly when one realises one has forgotten Tokyo Lonely Planet and is therefore English map-less for the next five days...
• Avoid eating the two bars of Dairy Milk one has squirreled away in one's bag. And figure out a tactic to squirrel away yet more goodies from the food and beverage counter.
• Sleep on the flight; for tomorrow is a busy day traipsing the streets of Tokyo...

TTFN Tweeps, see you on the other side x

 

 

Bounce

Maybe it was this that I had for breakfast that had me bouncing around and being generally rather cheerful today, although you could describe it as more of an amuse-bouche than a 'real breakfast'; I'll save that joy for tomorrow's Automat action with crazy Nicky.

Although it could also could have been having the opportunity give a young grad a foot on the ladder by way of offering employment in the marketing department. This goes hand in hand with rejecting two other candidates, so perhaps not so much...

Or maybe it was the constant stream of adrenalin I always feel when rushing between conf-calls and managing a team, whilst juggling budgets, PR plans, journalist Q&A's and tactical media buys. Or maybe it was the lunchtime caffeine pick-me-up with a friendly face and the snow that had the office rushing to the windows like excited primary school kids.

Or maybe it was the (long overdue) positive review and slap on the back from my CEO. Who knows...

Whatever it was, may it continue and in the meantime, thank you Shoe for putting a Bounce in my step today. Even if it did look like a "turd rolled in nuts" (as a member of my team so eloquently described my breakfast...)  

Old Habits

Why, during the short four minute walk from Clapham Junction to Chez Daisy when I walk past two Marks & Spencer’s, one Sainsbury’s, one Waitrose, one Asda (and with a further one minute walk, I could even peruse the aisles of Tescos and Somerfield), do I end up with THIS for my supper?  

I was rather pleased with myself this lunchtime when I managed to choose the superfood salad over the brie baguette. Although that smugness was short lived as I sheepishly pushed 60p into the vending machine, hit 'C4' and redeemed a Twix later that afternoon.  

Is it the fact I no longer have any interest in cooking for one (not that I ever really did…) or am I just giving in to the inevitable seasonal change, my desires for dairy based carb goodness and the innate desire to crawl into an extra layer of fat, ready for the winter months? I’m hanging all hopes on the latter.  

It’s through no fault but my own that I have zero will power, particularly around this time of year, but these old habits really will die hard.  

In with the rye bread, egg whites and oat milk, out with the peanut butter, chocolate pudding and Percy Pigs.  

Being virtuous is très, très dull. At least the bowl of green covers off two thirds of my Five A Day.

 

My Perfect Saturday Morning

After a shocking Friday, and the first decent night sleep since I got back (aided by red wine and melatonin I might add), I deserved a slice of what I consider to be my Perfect Saturday Morning.

That is, when I'm alone; there is nothing better than sharing a lazy Saturday morning with a significant other...

Scrambled eggs, slow cooked a la Amy Daisy style, a very large pot of coffee (all to myself), two episodes of Gossip Girl, cosy clothes and a load of washing in the machine. The latter not quite fitting into an ideal scenario, but there's nothing quite like the satisfaction of a clean wardrobe and no laundry hanging over your head.

Off to meet aunt from Canada today. Haven't seen her since I was 16.

 

The Land of the Rising Sun

 

This week AD is lost in translation.

I have a love / hate relationship with tokyo. Which probably isn’t abnormal or unheard of. It is a rather strange city – far removed from its Asian neighbours, yet linked closely in similarities to the uk (read: both are over-crowded islands, both are repressed societies, both leaders in technology; the British Industrial Revolution, the Japanese Technological Revolution…)

So I believe it's only fair you hear my list. And please excuse the non-capitalisation of cities / countries - TypePad is playing silly buggers and won't let me capitalise them for some inane reason.

I love…

The Oddities and Strange Japanese-isms. This is probably a little unfair as I suspect there are a lot of very strange things about English culture than any non-Anglo may find amusing. Still, tokyo always appeals to my anthropological training and curiosity of different cultures. My favourite oddities to date:

• You can't use the hotel swimming pool if you have a tattoo. The Beckhams would be buggered.
  
• Shoes only come in three sizes; small, medium and large.
• Fruit is beautifully over-packaged to within an inch of its life. And square watermelons retail for £60
• You can’t smoke anywhere on the street apart from at designated 'smoking corners', yet every bar and restaurant is a haze of smoke.
• Their obsessive-ness with cleanliness, yet their obsessive-ness with schoolgirl's knickers in vending machines. Hmmmm.
• Cartoons are used to illustrate public information / warning signs – I find this strange as it almost makes light of every situation. 
• English Milk Tea flavoured Haagen Dazs and Milk flavoured Pepsi – WTF?!
• The obsession with miniature everything and the fact grown women (and men...) have about 50 dangly things hanging off their mobile phones.

       

The Loos. Where else in the world can you find loos that sing to you, spray water in three different directions, warm your bum and self-clean? I’ve never spent so much time in a cubicle.

The Retail Environment. Having worked in the UK retail industry for nearly 10 years now (ouch), I’ve rarely been inspired by retail quite in the same way as in Tokyo. The sheer variety of independently owned boutiques and stores with totally unique offerings is so refreshing from the cookie-cutter approach we have on the uk high street. Quite refreshing, although depressing at the same time as all the clothes are Mini Mouse size.

The Style. Japanese men really do know how to dress well. These guys put the Italians to shame. The ladies, not so much… sorry girls. Apart from the cos play girls of Shibuya, who’s bleached blonde hair and Manga-style make-up I am endlessly fascinated by.

The Diet Products. Never before have I seen so many collagen based products. Collagen hair shampoo, collagen pills, collagen drinks for goodness sake. Not to mention the ‘cookies that help you bust grow’ (deliberate misspelling BTW), and the ‘baby smooth foot massager’, that resembles a cheese grater for your feet. Oh and not to mention ‘Deep Moist’ – AKA lip balm. Bad choice of wording there, ad boys.

Karaoke. What’s not to love about being locked in a darkened private room, with as much cheap vodka you can throw down your neck, a song directory bigger than the M25 Yellow Pages and a microphone? No one need suffer listening to me belt out Paint It Black ever again.

The fact my work mobile doesn’t work here. Bliss.

  

I hate…

The Extra Charges. Even though you are a paying guest staying at the ANA Intercontinental, you still have to pay additional for wireless internet access, the gym, the pool AND even if you want to park off on one of the sun-loungers. There really is no excuse for this.

The Weather. This is my fourth trip to Tokyo. I moaned my way through winter because it was too cold (it’s Baltic), and then summer was too humid. My beautifully freshly straightened hair, within two and a half minutes of stepping foot outside my hotel, resembled a frizzy mess. I have however been told the beautiful bright spring mornings and cherry blossom may stop my whingeing. But I am British after all… so who knows.

The Beige.  Tokyo, I was once told, reached its peak in the 1980’s. And my vista from the 35^th floor only proves that; revealing a palette of beige, mushroom and computer-monitor grey. There is however the spattering of an architectural experimentation in Harajuku or Omotosando, or the few and far between beautifully reconstructed post-war temples.

 

The Food. Being severely allergic to shellfish means I can’t partake in most culinary delights of japan. And when I order salad with no shrimp, I expect salad with no shrimp and not to be presented with a shrimp salad. So I have learnt to opt for the unidentified ‘meat on a stick’, which unfortunately leaves me having to spend the next few days not too far from a bathroom (reference above note re: loos – this is one saving grace at this point).

The Friendly Airport Limousine. There is NOTHING ‘friendly’ about a grotty coach that plays naff elevator music for two hours whilst crawling through the Japanese countryside from Narita to Tokyo, especially after a painful 13 hour flight from LHR.

The Non-Logic of Street Smarts. The streets don't have street signs. Buildings instead of being numbered in a logical numerical order, are numbered by the date they were built. This drives me crazy. The taxis and their automatic doors. I get yelled at every time in Japanese when my automatic reflex to close a car door kicks in. And weird stuff like this on the subway - why the need for the rail to follow the exact line of the steps please?

 

 

Lessons to be learnt

Notes to a 10 year old me

• You don’t have to finish everything on your plate; despite what Mum tells you. This is a lesson easier to learn sooner rather than later.
• Don’t eat too many sweets. Seriously. You’ll end up with a big bum for the rest of your life.
• You might want to start being good at sports at school – this goes back to the 'not eating too many sweets' lesson.
  
• It’s always better to be different, no matter how hard it is at school. Be proud of your Mum, she really is amazing and anyway, the other girls are only jealous their mothers aren’t as cool.
  
• Don’t take any notice of the nasty girls at school, I promise you they will all be pushing prams by the time they’re 18; whereas you have a life of adventure and excitement ahead of you.
  
• Spend more time with Grandpa Max; he won’t be around for much longer and you’ll miss him more than you realise when you’re older.
  
• Don’t be so mean to Ed. He is the best brother in the world.

Notes to a 16 year old me

• Listen to Mum and Dad; they’re pretty smart and will be an incredible constant source of inspiration and support through your life.
  
• Don’t cut your hair short; despite everyone saying it’ll look thicker, it doesn’t suit you. Oh and go blonde earlier. That does suit you.
  
• Wear mini-skirts for as long as you have the legs - whatever age you are.
  
• Don’t drive Ed’s go-kart after drinking three glasses of champagne this summer. You will go through the garden fence and end up in A&E for three days with a piece of wood lodged into your skull.
  
• That guy you’re going to meet next year isn’t ‘the one’. So please don't waste seven years trying to figure it out.
  
• Always use sun screen, don’t wear too much makeup and don’t over-pluck your eyebrows.
  
• Go travelling when you finish university, don’t wait two years or let your boyfriend hold you back. You’ll have more fun when you’re younger. Having said that, if you do go travelling when you’re 24, you will have an incredible experience and will come back a more confident and stronger person. Just make sure you say a proper goodbye to Grandma before you leave; you won’t see her again.
  
• Make sure you always stay in touch with Christine; she will be the most constant and honest friend throughout your life. You will be her bridesmaid, godmother to her son and she knows you better than anyone.
  

Notes to a 21 year old me

• Your twenties will be a hot-bed of insecurity, worry and pressure; but don't worry, everyone else is going through the same issues.
  
• Your thirties will be more relaxed and fun, but be warned everything really does start to sag and wrinkle.
  
• The good news is that you’ll be a marketing manager for an international fashion brand before you are 28; travelling the world and meeting fascinating people. The ‘bad news’ is you won’t be married, a mother or even be engaged by the time you’re 30, but neither will most people around you. You’ll be having too much fun to worry about that anyway.
  
• Don’t rush to find a boyfriend. But when you do meet someone, make sure you’re with him for the right reasons and remember to listen to your initial doubts; they will eventually become the reasons for breaking up.
  
• Don’t be in such a rush to get to Arizona from Las Vegas on the day after your 25^th birthday. You will be involved in a serious car crash on Route 101 and nearly die. Oh and don’t get Ed to call mum to break the news, call her yourself.
  
• When you meet Luke Perry at the Superbowl party, be cool. Don’t gush about how much you have fancied him since you were 11. This is not cool.
  
• Brush up on celebrities before you work at Selfridges; in particular Dustin Hoffman. You don’t want to refuse him entry to a party just because you don’t recognise him. Again, this is not cool.
  
• Make the big step and buy that house in London. As scary as it may seem at the time, it will be the best investment of your life to date. It will open up your life to new social circles and you will have the best few years of your life living there. 
  

Notes to a 30 year old me 

• It’s better to be over dressed than under dressed.
  
• Don’t try to please all the time. But always stay true to what you believe in.
  
• When it comes to friendship, always go for quality rather than quantity.
• Don’t expect too much from your friends, some will hurt you and let you down. But those who don’t are true friends.
  
• Always try to understand what makes people behave a certain way.
  
• Believe in yourself, you are stronger than you realise.
  
• Always know when it's time to move on and listen to what Dad says; "it's best to leave a party early, rather than hang around to the bitter end."
• And finally, stop worrying; it’ll all work out in the end.
  

 

 

 

Ed's Two Desserts at The Wolseley

Champagne at Claridges