The rules of a business class lounge.

One must:

 

• Always maximise the time in the lounge, bypassing all duty-free shops, including Reiss, Kurt Geiger and Smythson. Even if one has found plentiful goods to purchase.
• Stop off at WHSmith to buy 1l bottle of water (if one is swathed in cashmere for the duration of the flight, one must ensure one is re-hydrated throughout...)
• Grab every English fashion / style / gossip related magazine possible. Avoid all Scandinavian magazines and copies of the Daily Mail.
• Suss out immediately, whilst not looking like a novice, exactly where the food, beverages and bathrooms are located. In particular when one hasn´t used this particular lounge before...
• Position oneself next to, or close to, said food and beverage counter to maximise consumption and intake.
• Fill one's plate with at least one of every single morsel on offer. Including the shortbread biscuits. And the mini crackers. Even if you're not hungry; this is a vital part of the experience.
• Check out all of your fellow travellers and wonder who will be next to you on the flight. Pray it's not the guy freeloading on the Asahi beer and peanuts. Or the brat-ish Japanese kids running circles around their passive parents.
• Avoid eye contact with aforementioned freeloader, who has now positioned himself next to you in the Business Centre, even though there is half a lounge of empty seats available for the taking.
• Check the Departures board occasionally, to ensure one does not miss one's flight, due to excessive prosecco consumption.
• Understand how to use a Scandinavian keyboard, or at least have the ability and dexterity to maneuver the mouse to make changes to every single word. After excessive prosecco consumption.
• Not curse too loudly when one realises one has forgotten Tokyo Lonely Planet and is therefore English map-less for the next five days...
• Avoid eating the two bars of Dairy Milk one has squirreled away in one's bag. And figure out a tactic to squirrel away yet more goodies from the food and beverage counter.
• Sleep on the flight; for tomorrow is a busy day traipsing the streets of Tokyo...

TTFN Tweeps, see you on the other side x

 

 

Comments

[discount business class tickets]

In short: think cheap, act classy. Don't let them know you got there because of discount business class tickets!